Scientists - make this your resolution.

Superman has Kryptonite. Pooh has honey. NicUnCool has Ricky Martin Van Buren Raden the cat. I have ice cream.

Ice cream, you are like... yourself. Your frozen, heavenly, fatty, delicious self. I hate you. And I love you. You make me want you, and then you stick in my fat cells forever. Even Zumba can't cancel you out, and Zumba is an easy to moderate workout, depending on the day.

Now I hear that scientists are working on a healthier ice cream. Don't be confused! It's not good for you, despite what that tricky headline makes you think. It's just less bad. Like how Nicole Richie is less bad than Paris Hilton. Both ice creams will destroy your body, and both NR and PH will destroy your soul.

Scientists, stop half-assing it and produce a frozen, heavenly, nutritious, delicious self. Eliminate "fatty" and other bad adjectives. Create my dream food, already.

2010 - A Year for Ice Cream Miracles