An owl named Pigwidgeon could have delivered this.

I went to Harry Potter land for my bachelorette party. Oh yeah, I totally outbacheloretted you. There, I received the poem below and several tasks that I failed. (Don't judge me. It's hard to order butterbeer in Parseltongue....)

KJDub, the girl who lived,
Many missions you will be gived.

All these tasks you must complete
Or Harpy Walden, Voldy will eat.

You will be given tasks one at a time.
None involve coronas and lime.

Don't look for owls. Florida is too hot.
Task by text is what you've got.

Blimey! Each task will be hard.
Always be vigilant, be on your guard.

Strange people may approach you.
You must complete those tasks too.

After completing the tasks you'll be ready to wed,
And be ready for hippogriff-style in the marriage bed.

Like Harry Potter, you can rely on your friends.
They'll be with you until the end.

We hope you succeed. We hope you don't flunk.
Because once you succeed, we can get crunk!

Hypothetical "Most Awesome Day" Becomes Reality

If someone had asked, "What would be your ideal Saturday?" I'd answer, "Well, Asker, I'd want to go on a short hike with my dogger, bake cookies, spend an hour or two reading, socialize a bit, and find free money."

Well stomp your foot, it totally happened.

Harper Dog and I trotted around Carkeek Park, my favorite King County location. It cancels out so much urban crappiness. Plus, we met a well-behaved dachshund named Moe.

I baked thumbprint cookies for our neighbor because he always takes out our garbage on Wednesday mornings when we've forgotten. I saved a couple for Hamb, because that is one of the perks of being engaged to me. Cookies.

I flopped on the couch and read The Bishop's Man. Solid characters, interesting story.

Tonight, Hambo and I are heading to the neighbors for dinner, cards, and dog frolics. (Their pupper Coal is a black lab mix. He makes sounds like Chewbacca.)

And the free money? Yep, that happened too. The federal government decided that I overpaid them, so they're giving me a pile of cash back. I love tax refunds almost as much as I love taxes. Truth. "Taxes are a down payment on the common good." The common good is wonderful! Give me a hug, common good! And feel free to toss me a couple dollars!

It's too bad you weren't here, reader pal. Today was a winner.

In case you missed it, here is an adorable picture of Harper and Drew's feet.